Size Does Not Matter To Editors

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by J. Scott Bugher

In the publisher / writer relationship, size doesn’t matter. Yet I’ve encountered so many writers who do not concur with that. They think it’s all about the size of their dick (and I’m speaking metaphorically when it comes to female writers). So take the following illustration and learn your lesson if you believe size matters.

I rejected a manuscript from a contest held by Split Lip Press. Upon receiving the contest results announcement, the writer of the rejected manuscript got upset. So he emails me. Says, “I have four published books, have appeared in over 100 magazines, and many of the poems from the manuscript you rejected have been published by a number of elite journals.” What was he expecting by telling me this? For me to write an apology and admit I fucked up and am a failure as an editor / publisher? No. Fuck that guy. I could give a shit that he has 4 books and all sorts of publications. That didn’t change that his work blew chunks.

Now, if you’re a writer who believes you’re a big deal, consider this:

Say, if you’re a male, you ask a woman out for a date and she rejects you. What do you do? Do you say, “Oh yeah? Well, I have a ten-inch dick and have slept with 78 women and have had 22 threesomes.” Will that make the woman apologize and feel that she made a big mistake by rejecting you? Probably not. Instead, you’ll probably receive a backhand to your face or a well-earned kick in the balls.

Bottom line: If you’re a writer and feel it’s important to tell an editor how important you are, or how big your dick is, you’re doing nothing but asking for a backhand to your face.

Who Do We Publish

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by J. Scott Bugher

So, as you might have read in the first post, we have a few forthcoming books: A Two-Year Diary: The Best of Split Lip Magazine  (August 31, 2014),  Ice Children by Ed Harkness, (September 22, 2014) The Bear Who Ate the Stars by Julia Kolchinsky Dasbach (October 20, 2014) and Love & Sundries by Nicholas Reading (November 17, 2014).

Who are we looking for and what are we seeking to publish next? The “who” we’re looking for needs to an active contributor to the literary community, not one simply seeking to add leverage to their CV. The “what” we’re looking for needs to be in sync with the information below.

We like something that does something, which results in something new. Fiction with an arc and poetry with a narrative. Vignettes of mundane life, notes of pop culture, hints of sex, etc. Stories that take place in a motel room instead of the jungle, poems narrating a story instead of a stretch of abstruse metaphors. We want grit, and grit does not mean porn or gore. Grit means trouble, the “I’ve been there before” type: rolling up the window next to a panhandler at a stoplight, getting yelled at for public breastfeeding, trying to slip a condom over a half-erect penis, running without grace to the bathroom in need of relief, selling prized possessions to a pawn shop due to hard times, et cetera.

Still uncertain? How about we list some writers we like. That always helps.

PROSE: Nicholson Baker, Ann Beattie, John Cheever, Anton Chekov, Raymond Carver, Mary Karr, Charles Bukowski, Richard Yates, Janet Fitch, Cormac McCarthy, Flannery O’Connor.

POETRY: Kim Addonizio, James Tate, Stephen Dobyns, Sharon Olds, Richard Hugo, Michael Meyerhofer, Jack Gilbert, Allison Joseph, Claudia Emerson, Marie Howe, Yusef Komunyakaa.

Split Lip Press publishes poetry or flash fiction/memoir chapbooks, full-length poetry or short story/memoir collections, and novellas.

Writers taken in by Split Lip will get: the Split Lip  imprint, 25% royalties instead of the standard 10% – 15%, an ISBN, a well-designed book, a handful of author copies, promotion, and additional copies sold to the author at a fair price. We also offer discounted rates on author website design if one is interested.

We accept queries with a manuscript sample: 3 – 5 poems or 3 – 5 pages of prose. Please do not submit full manuscripts. If the sample blows our minds, we’ll ask for the full package.

Submission guidelines and how to submit can be found HERE.